Child custody matters are difficult to handle when you have a lot of other things going on. Yet, you know that your children must be a priority. Sometimes, the situation is made even more challenging because you and your ex don’t agree. Finding ways to minimize conflicts in these situations is crucial.
One goal that you should have during this process is making sure that your kids are being put first. This isn’t always easy because it can mean putting yourself aside to focus on them. These tips can help you to work things out without getting too stressed.
Write out your wishes
You should write out what you think the children need. You can review this when you have to think about decisions regarding them. This might help you to refocus. It can also serve as a checklist to think about how the options you have will either help you to meet your wishes for the children or if they will push those wishes to the wayside.
Remember that you are an adult
One problem that sometimes occurs in these cases is that one parent behaves in a controlling or manipulative manner. This is rather difficult because you might feel like you aren’t able to stand up for yourself. You are your child’s parent and should be able to make choices regarding their care. Look deep inside yourself and find the strength to stand up for your children when necessary.
Check your words and tone
You should always speak to your ex with a respectful tone. Be careful about what you say and how you say it. This is especially important when your kids are around since they are perceptive and are paying close attention to what is going on. They will use the examples from you to learn how to behave. Additionally, you should be careful when you are writing things like texts or emails to your ex since your emotions and voice inflections won’t be evident in the messages.
Make sure that you put things that must happen into the parenting plan. This enables you to review those points so that you can ensure you are complying with them. It is also an opportunity for you to clarify certain issues. As your child grows, you may need to have the parenting plan modified to meet their current needs.